May 1, 2002
Report of a training workshop on how to create
circles of compassion
Lausanne, Switzerland
20 April 2002
Following the announcement of last year by the Women's World Summit Foundation (WWSF), partner of the Millionth Circle movement (www.millionthcircle.org), to introduce in Switzerland and throughout its NGO network a methodology for the promotion and seeding of circles in order to cultivate equality, justice, sustainable livelihoods, prevention of abuse, learning to forgive and live in peace, etc., a first presentation was organized on 20 April 2002 in French by WWSF and the Association Vivre Autrement (VA) which has included the workshop of creating circles of compassion on its list of regular workshops offered to the public.
Elly- (WSSF) and Pierre Pradervand (VA) animated the first circle presentation/workshop which was a moving and even holy experience. Participants numbered 12 women and 3 men, plus the two presenters.
After an initial presentation by each participant, participants were asked to share their reasons for attending and what they expected from the workshop. The answers ranged from concern with the destruction of the environment, concern for the future of our children, the erosion of basic human values, concern for economic justice, how to end suffering and gain a deeper understanding of compassion, how to learn to communicate on a deeper level, avoid being a victim, open one's heart and be compassionate, learn to forgive, love and share more, to name some of them.
After introducing the basic rules for the workshop (everyone is master and student at the same time, the absence of hierarchy, to speak in the first person, the workshop being a co-creation with all participants, etc.), a variety of exercises in small groups was proposed on topics such as true listening (e.g. empathy compared to sympathy and related ideas developed by Carl Rogers, a psychologist of world renown) and a few key concepts relating to circles, dialogue and communication were presented.
Elly then presented the basic approach and guidelines for creating circles in general and circles of compassion in particular (or women's circles, the method is exactly the same, only the name and the concerns change, plus the presence of men). The approach can be summarized in the following points:
• Create the circle as a sacred space with absolutely no judgement of persons• Each one speaks in turn &endash; no one interrupts. The circles have adopted the American-Indian idea of the "talking stick": i.e. each person who speaks holds a stick (or other object: we had a beautifully engraved egg-shaped African stone, which symbolised the weight of the speaker's word) and as long as a person holds it, no one else can speak or interrupt.
• Creating a space where everyone is really listened to, including those who are not used to speaking in public
• Really speaking from the heart
• Participants share their experiences, they do not offer advice
• Leadership in the circle is always shared between all participants
• Whatever is shared remains confidential.
• Open and close the circle by hearing each voice.
Elly presented the work by Jean Shinoda Bolen, Beverly Engel and Cristina Baldwin and presented and sold their books. Pierre emphasized the importance of seeing the circle as principle and form and its sacredness which resonates in us since eons of time. Circles in general and especially circles of compassion open people up to honest communication without barriers. In such circles one listens and speaks from the heart.
Participants discussed in small groups the different ways they communicate, what communication means to them and the mechanisms we have internalized to judge what we hear. Feedback was put on a flip chart and discussed. Texts on listening were shared and read.
Another topic we introduced was shadow and projection (a consequence of shadow) often emerging in circle work and how to deal with it. By projection is meant to project an aspect of oneself (positive or negative) on another person or group. Once this mechanism is recognized it can become a precious tool to reclaim those parts which had been denied.
After presenting other aspects and tools to create circles and/or circles of compassion, i.e. where to meet, number of people to invite, frequency and length of meetings, rotating leadership, centering the circle, creating a center piece and deciding on a talking stick or object, ensuring that participants have a commitment to attend regularly, as well as the importance of creating a sacred space, security, and the quality of the first circle meeting, participants asked many questions.
In the later part of the afternoon, the group decided to create a first "circle of compassion". We moved from theory to practice and built a center piece with a candle and talking object. It was really a holy experience. Participants decided on the theme of forgiveness. The quality of listening was extraordinary, the love between participants just flowed so easily &endash; as well as the humour and laughter at times, despite the "seriousness" of the topic. It was for both, Elly and Pierre, a truly sacred experience. Participants unanimously decided to meet again mid June and spend a whole afternoon deepening the sharing on forgiveness.
The whole experience was profoundly spiritual. We are excited by what we see as the potential of this kind of approach to create grassroots community circles for collective responsibility about the state of our planet and develop the capacity for compassion in the world. More and more we experience that people are looking for new forms of spiritual connectedness, and also for new ways to meet. We will be doing a lot of listening to try and hear where such an experience might lead us and feel happy having launched the trend of empowering people to create circles of compassion in their busy lives. Long live the Millionth Circle movement.
Elly Pradervand is the director of the Women's World Summit Foundation, which she founded in 1991. It is an international, nonprofit, non-confessional, humanitarian organization based in Geneva, with United Nations ECOSOC consultative status, which is working for a new development paradigm and for the implementation of women's and children's rights. You may visit their website at www.woman.ch